a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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