if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
