my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
