My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
