She's JV to your varsity
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
