i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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