Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
