He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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