fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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