turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
What a dumb baby whore.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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