GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
