I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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