In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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