awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just pee around me
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
