I wish I could punch you in the face.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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