Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
