hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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