i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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