wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
