Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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