i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
