Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
