Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
