Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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