I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
