You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Randomize
