I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
