There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
