Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize