We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
