Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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