yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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