Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
