it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
