tell your sister to shave her snatch
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
