You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
