I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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