Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I didn't notice because vodka
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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