Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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