I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
All the doctor said was why
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
