So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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