i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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