I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
