i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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