she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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