i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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