how do flat chested girls get laid?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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