You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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