There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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