I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
He felt like a one man threesome
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
