I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
